Uni doesn't quite play out how you expect...

13) Expectation

You'll party hard.

Reality

You'll hang hard.

12) Expectation

You'll eat a lot of beans

Reality

You'll eat so many beans you go insane.

11) Expectation

You'll join a sports team.

Reality

You'll do this and many other unspeakable things to join a sports team...

...and then not actually do the sports bit. But you'll keep the t-shirt...

10) Expectation

You'll learn in inspiring surroundings...

Reality

You'll learn somewhere grim.

9) Expectation

If you leave your room unlocked, no-one will prank you.

The reality

8) Expectation

At least halls will be nice.

Reality

Halls are modelled on prisons.

7) Expectation

You'l keep the kitchen clean and under control.

Reality

After one month, you think this is under control...

6) Expectation

You'll meet the love of your life.

Reality

You'll meet the love of someone else's life.

Someone's awful life.

5) Expectation

You'll do all the reading.

Reality

You'll do a lot of pretending to read.

Just like Bush, but in seminars.

4) Expectation

Now that you're a uni student you'll drink, but stay classy.

Reality

No-one looks classy when they drink, least of all you.

3) Expectation

It'll be easy, I was the smartest kid in college.

Reality

Turns out everyone in college was dumb, and this is you...

2) Expectation

I can drink and make it into 9am lectures...

Reality

1) Expectation

I can get away with being drunk in seminars.

Reality

They know.