13 uni expectations vs 13 bleak uni realities
Uni doesn't quite play out how you expect...
13) Expectation
You'll party hard.
Reality
You'll hang hard.
12) Expectation
You'll eat a lot of beans
Reality
You'll eat so many beans you go insane.
11) Expectation
You'll join a sports team.
Reality
You'll do this and many other unspeakable things to join a sports team...
...and then not actually do the sports bit. But you'll keep the t-shirt...
10) Expectation
You'll learn in inspiring surroundings...
Reality
You'll learn somewhere grim.
9) Expectation
If you leave your room unlocked, no-one will prank you.
The reality
8) Expectation
At least halls will be nice.
Reality
Halls are modelled on prisons.
7) Expectation
You'l keep the kitchen clean and under control.
Reality
After one month, you think this is under control...
6) Expectation
You'll meet the love of your life.
Reality
You'll meet the love of someone else's life.
Someone's awful life.
5) Expectation
You'll do all the reading.
Reality
You'll do a lot of pretending to read.
Just like Bush, but in seminars.
4) Expectation
Now that you're a uni student you'll drink, but stay classy.
Reality
No-one looks classy when they drink, least of all you.
3) Expectation
It'll be easy, I was the smartest kid in college.
Reality
Turns out everyone in college was dumb, and this is you...
2) Expectation
I can drink and make it into 9am lectures...
Reality
1) Expectation
I can get away with being drunk in seminars.
Reality
They know.