Student is only one to show up to seminar, lecturer does TWO HOUR seminar anyway
A student was shocked after he showed up to a seminar to find he was the only one there, only to be told by the lecturer that they were going ahead with the seminar anyway.
Michael Parsons* showed up for his two-hour sociology module seminar, on Sex and Society, yesterday as usual. Unbeknownst to Michael it was reading week and this was the only module that had decided to run anyway, and nobody else was going to show up.
What followed was a two-hour cringe-fest, as the lecturer decided to proceed with the seminar, even though Michael clearly hadn't done the reading.
"Maybe someone will come. Let's give them ten minutes."
"I got to the social studies buildings and they were weirdly empty. I didn't think much of it - I was about ten minutes late. I was still practicing excuses for why I was so late when I opened the door and saw the whole classroom was just fucking empty."
"Honest to god you should have seen his happy little face, it was heartbreaking. He was so pleased someone had shown up. He'd got all these biscuits laid out as an apology for getting us in during reading week. I had to eat about eight, I wasn't even hungry."
Rather than let Michael go, the lecturer waited patiently for other people to show up.
"He kept saying 'Maybe someone will come. Let's give them ten minutes.'
"So we waited there like muppets on hiatus. Just staring at each other, glancing at the clock. My god that clock was fucking loud."
The time ticked away, and still nobody showed up.
"Ten minutes in I think 'ah good, he'll let me go now'. No. He tells me to get my reading out and lets hear my thoughts.
"No-one else was there and I hadn't done the goddamn reading."
I hadn't done any reading
Unfortunately for Michael, things were about to get a hell of a lot worse. He hadn't done any of his reading whatsoever, as the lecturer was about to find out during the TWO HOUR seminar.
"I only showed up to this one because I'd missed about six others this year. I was hoping to sit there quietly and say 'I agree with Charlie' if anyone asked for my opinion.
"Now here I was having a one-on-one chinwag with an expert in the fucking field."
Michael tried to blag his way through the rest of the seminar as best he could, but soon it became clear he wasn't going to make it the whole way through, as he didn't even know the name of the sociologist who had written the assigned reading the lecturer had set.
"He kept mentioning Fucko" Michael told Student Money Saver.
"Do you mean Foucault. As in Foucault's theory of Power?" I ask him, nervously. I took sociology myself.
"Oh Jesus Christ," Michael sighs down the phone. "I kept calling him Fucko. The lecturer he's got this accent..."
Michael howls in despair, and returns to the phone some thirty seconds later.
"Honestly I didn't pay £9,000 a year for this shit."
Points for showing up
About twenty minutes in, Michael says the lecturer clearly knew he hadn't done the reading, as he switched to telling Michael what the reading contained, rather than try to discuss it.
"What do you think tipped him off?" I asked Michael.
"In retrospect it was probably the fucko debacle. You taking the piss?"
After another hour of this, the lecturer looked at his watch and said "I think that's enough for now". As a reward for being the only one for showing up, he even let Michael bag the biscuits to take home.
*surname name changed at his request.
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"I went to get out after pulling the plug and I just slid around like a giant greased up potato in a roasting dish." https://t.co/nuBbLaX0VR— Student Money Saver (@studentmoneysvr) February 3, 2017