The 28 terrible stages of writing an essay

So you left your essay to the last second again, huh? Get ready to go through all 28 stages of the last minute essay...

28) Announcing to everyone that you're finally doing your essay

27) Watching Netflix until it says "are you there" and feeling shamed into actually starting your essay

Don't judge me.

26) Opening Word

25) Opening every link on the internet

24) Answering the door to a friend and pretending to work

23) Updating your status to "there is literally nothing worse in the world than writing an essay"

22) Remembering your essay is on genocide

21) Updating your status to "there is nothing worse in the world than writing an essay, other than genocide"

20) Checking how many people liked your status

19) Deleting status

18) Disabling the internet for your own good

17) Staring blankly at a mirror in order to entertain yourself

16) Sigh heavily and open word

15) Forget everything you know about your subject entirely

14) Stare at the title then spend an hour re-wording it with the phrase, 'In this essay, I will be discuss...' in front of it

13) Deciding to type everything you know and then edit it down to a good essay afterwards

12) Lose all hope

11) Getting angry at everyone else for not struggling with their essays

10) Realise you absolutely have to get this essay done right now

9) Make food even though you're not hungry

8) Find all your sources on Wikipedia

7) Remember there are rules about using Wikipedia

6) Write in a frenzy

5) Reading your essay back to yourself

4) Realise it's still nowhere near the word count, and add in more adjectives

3) Pad word count with chunks of text you've found on Google Scholar. Change the wording slightly and try not to think about plagiarism

2) Congratulate yourself

1) Hand it in

Procrastinating? Check out these 16 fun free and funny websites to procrastinate on...