17 signs you're a fresher
There are some pretty clear signs you're a fresher. You're drunk right now and yet you still plan on going to class. The biggest sign of all is you've just started your first year. Here are some of the other subtle clues you're giving off that you're a newbie...
1) You're currently carrying a campus map and without it you won't be able to get home
You're willing to kill to keep possession of your map.
2) But you're still asking for directions
...despite being in the exact place you're supposed to be at.
3) You feel incredibly grown up, but 2nd and 3rd years see you like this
4) You have a schedule in your pocket, and you look at it constantly
5) You're not sure if your supposed to ask to go to the bathroom in seminars and lectures
You definitely should, by the way. Everyone does.
6) You get dressed up in your best things for a lecture
What? I always wear this.
7) You own a guitar and know how to play Wonderwall
8) You say you don't miss your parents
But cry yourself to sleep at night.
9) You go to every lecture, even the 9am ones
This will change very quickly.
10) You've bought all the course books and genuinely believe you're going to read them
Even the one with more words than pictures.
11) You think your loan money is magical free money
And immediately consider buying yourself a top hat.
12) You've joined the gym, and you fully believe you'll go
You won't go. No-one goes to gyms.
13) When a stranger talks to you you assume they're trying to be your friend, rather than trying to mug you
Fire alarms seem like a fun opportunity to meet new people.
14) You still buy beer in rounds
And believe your rounds will even out over the night.
15) You think a traffic light disco is a good idea for some reason
And forget you only own one orange item of clothing...
16) You've joined every society available
Even the Assassin's Guild...
17) Also you're so drunk right now you forgot how to walk...
And fully intend to stay that way.