What do the secret codes on the tube mean?

If you've ever used the tube, you've probably heard some odd announcements. Code one, or "calling Inspector Sands". But what do they mean? Well, code two means exactly what you think it means...

Here are the tube codes according to the TFL press office. Try not to be around when any of these happen.

Inspector Sands:

According to TFL "Inspector Sands" means that a fire alarm has been operated and staff have two minutes to come to the control room - if they don't check it automatically evacuates the station.

According to internet rumours "Inspector Sands" means there is an imminent bomb threat. Either way, you don't want to be around when Mr Sands is.

The rest of the TFL codes are reserved for various spillages:

Code 1 = Blood

Someone has left their blood somewhere that isn't inside of their bodies. Code one alerts a member of cleaning staff to go clean it up.

Code 2 = Urine/Feces

Yep, code number two means that someone has gone for a number two.

Code 3 = Vomit

Someone's lunch has gone Southbound.

Code 4 = General spillage

One of the nicer of the codes. One we imagine TFL cleaners look forward too. Twice as nice as a code two.

Code 5 = Broken glass

Ah, tube-people. You do like to drink.

Code 6 = Litter

Ah, tube-people. You do like throwing your sh*t on the floor.

Code 7 = Anything not fitting these categories.

Can't quite tell if it's a code two or a three mixed with a four? Call a code seven, just to be on the safe side.

TFL have so far failed to confirm what the code is for "mole-people attack" despite several emails we've sent, marked "urgent".