Robot writes new Friends scripts, and they're seriously messed up
If you wished Friends had carried on, do we have some good news for you. A guy trying to learn programming has created a robot that is writing new episodes of Friends which could easily serve as series 11, if he can make them a little less terrifying and gross.
Trainee event planner Andy Pandy created a scriptbot, feeding old episodes of Friends into the machine and asking it to generate new scripts.
We're not on board with the new "Monica and Ross are making out" plotline, but other than that this robot could probably make it in show-business. Here are a few of the script samples he provided on his Twitter page of the robot's work.
The one where Ross, Monica and Phoebe violate all social boundaries
This is the first episode pitch churned out by the machine:
"Monica and Rachel are running, discussing Monica's upcoming wedding. Rachel leaves abruptly to work. Annoyed at this rude exit, Monica makes out with Ross in anger and Phoebe announces she wants to propose to her child (as yet unmentioned). They are all upset by this, bar Joey who has a clown toy to distract him. Monica whispers in enigmatic (and terrifying) fashion that "she's in London" - and the entire audience nopes the hell out."
The one where the gang says "oh my god"
"Episode pitch - Rachael gives Joey her soap opera wife, remembers she has a baby and is distressed by this. She announces she has a baby to the group. The gang agree and eat pizza."
The one where John Claude Van Dame will go in a crap
We'd watch this one. This one has a lot of potential. How will Van Damme get out of a crap? Will lady jumpy over to him for rescue? What of Chicken Bob? Will Chandler get out of muffin? Find out, in robo-friends.
The one where they celebrate Happy Gandalf and Chandler dies
Episode pitch from robot:
"Chandler is in couch, screaming, maybe dying. Proposes to shoe whilst he dies. Joey has children (cave children? We'll work on details later...). Monica wishes everyone a Happy Gandalf and leaves for Minsk forever. Rachel is pleased.
The creator of the robot thinks he could probably sell the robot to a network, and we kind of agree.
i reckon i could tweak this a bit & sell it to a network. all i'd have to do is push a button and BAM, top quality sitcom fodder ready to go— Andy Pandy (@_Pandy) January 18, 2016
Get ready for Rob-Friends, everybody.