​The 10 lies we all tell ourselves at the start of a new year

So January exams are out of the way and now it’s the start of a new term. Yet as much as we wish to think optimistically about these next 12 weeks, let’s be honest, it’s not going to be easy… not to mention any new year’s resolutions we have (/had). Lizzi Hart of the Graduate Recruitment Bureau shares the most common lies we tell ourselves once a new term begins.

1) I’m going to attend every lecture and seminar

Sorry, but no. This will not happen unless you decide to sleep in your lecture hall (and don’t lie, we’ve all considered it).

2) By buying this lovely new notebook, diary, pencil case and fountain pen, I’m bound to get a first

You’ll probably use them for a week, but eventually your bag will be a cave of crumpled and smudged ‘notes’, a few broken biros and a coffee stained textbook. Well, you tried.

3) I’ll go to the gym at least twice a week

Doubtful. Even with your snazzy new yoga pants from your Auntie, work, sleep and alcohol will all soon take priority. Oh and chocolate.

4) I will spend my student loan wisely

Nope. You might not go out out much (though when you do = shots), but when you stay in in you’ll still need a family size bag of popcorn, a bottle of vino and a big-ass tub of cookie dough ice-cream. Sorry student loan.

5) I will cook every day and NOT live off pizza

Reality: you’ll do a big shop at the start of term, eat well for a fortnight and then satisfy your hunger pangs with old tins from the back of your cupboard. Did someone say Domino’s?

6) To keep my social life intact, I’ll go out every week.

If only this was a good/realistic idea. As the workload picks up, it’s unlikely you’ll find time for your favourite douchebag club, or that questionable fried chicken shop. But your bank will reward you with more money for pizza - sorry, I mean salad.

7) I’ll do all of my weekly reading

Yeah right. You’ll probably start off well, but eventually those afternoons and evenings will fade into an abyss of Facebook stalking and Netflix binges.

8) I’ll start my coursework early

Instead, you’ll leave everything to the last minute because nothing breeds productivity more than panic and fear.

9) I’ll use my spare time to become more employable

But bed is so warm. And comforting. Maybe you should just take a quick 2 hour nap and try again tomorrow.

10) Let’s face it, I’m never gonna change.

Completely wrong. University has already changed you into a fabulous and awesome person, even if you can’t make it to those pesky 9ams like every week. Stay strong, you can do it!

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